Numbers Game

12 whole wheat crackers. 180 calories. 6 hours until bedtime. 2 minutes until stomach stops growling. 20 years counting calories. 30 years of life. 14,746 steps. 45 minutes on the treadmill. 4 unopened cups of Greek yogurt. 2 flashbacks to fifth grade. 7 flashbacks to the pool party. 15 hairs plucked. 16 episodes left. 11 shreds of low-moisture part-skim mozzarella on last night’s salad. 9 missed calls. 0 interest in Hinge. 4 cans of Diet Coke. 5 croutons on last night’s salad. 46 pages to go. 2 good memories of Jamie. 6 bad memories of camp. 10 urges to call Mom and Dad back. 21 thoughts of chicken fingers. 4 daydreams. 3 fantasies of Benicio del Toro. 6 drops of blood from picked skin. 2 shades of nail polish that look like blood. 9 days of missed period. 4 more pounds to go. 5 actually. 24 chews for each bite of food before swallowing to promote satiety. 10 or so people laughing in the apartment next door. 3 gusts of wind that knock on the window. 8 seconds until the tea’s warmed in the microwave. 73 movies on the watchlist. 4 friends missed. 6 friends not missed. 30mg of Prozac. 9 glasses of water. 31 Instagram stories watched. 95 Tweets read. 5% phone battery left. 19 glances in the mirror. 6 pairs of jeans tried on. $15,000+ to get a nose job, says Google. 7 broccoli sprouts on the floor. 16 minutes to clean the bathroom. 2 Amazon orders. 2 too many. 3 weeks left until the block of tofu expires. 49 recipes bookmarked. 200 calories in tomorrow’s protein bar for lunch. 1 good, long cry. 1 more day.

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